The origin of this story isn't very romantic -- at least not in the traditional sense. St. Valentine was a Roman Priest at a time when there was an emperor named Claudius.
Claudius persecuted the church and also had an edict that prohibited the marriage of young people. He thought unmarried soldiers fought better than married soldiers, because married soldiers might be afraid of what would happen to their wives or families if they died.
I AM ENOUGH…but I grew up thinking otherwise. All because of someone else’s insecurity. I believed a lie. It felt so real, so tangible, but it was just smoke and mirrors.
I was in third grade and attending a Christian school. My parents were going through a divorce. My world felt a little shaky. The enemy saw a little girl who was ripe for the picking. I had just recently talked my Mom into letting me wear pantyhose. I was allowed to wear nude, but not suntan. Suntan would make me look too old. I remember walking up to the front porch of the school where a guy was hanging with some of his teenage friends.
He asked me, “What is that on your legs?”
I responded very sheepishly, “Pantyhose.”
He said, “What size are they? Q for queen?!” while laughing with his friends.
I remember turning around and walking away. I distinctively remember seeing the ground as I walked. At that moment, I decided that anything I do and wear will be critiqued. That everything was open for judgment. Nothing would go unnoticed. I was something to laugh at. I was weird. I was abnormal. I was less than.
There have been many events that have derailed me in my timeline. There have been moments of deep hurt, betrayal, manipulative and destructive 'prophetic words', abuse by spiritual authority and the list goes on...
It has taken me many years of searching and seeking the Lord for healing to get to this place that I am today. A place where I am still sorting through fragmented memories, trying to make sense of my story. Realizing that there are so many "Monsters" attached to the woundings of my heart and that in a way I have nurtured those "Monsters" and consoled them at times, believing that they were the only safe place to run to.
Pages from our journals of life...
These are little glimpses into the stories of the j2i Team & guest. We believe that as we share deeper levels of healing are birthed not only in our hearts but in the hearts of others as well. As you read and find yourself relating to the letters that create our timelines, please comment, message an author, or register for a class.